The Many Deaths of Harry Potter
by Nigelcat1
Summary: Harry Potter is really the Boy Who Lived, then died, then lived again, died/lived, etc. more times then anyone ever knew. He must always survive to fulfill his destiny but what about his poor Grim Reaper?


THE MANY DEATHS OF HARRY POTTER

J K Rowling owns all the rights to the books and the amazing characters she created. I write only to satisfy my imagination and use my creativity and make no money from my writings.

The first time Harry James Potter died was the night of October 31, 1981 when Lord Voldemort cast the killing curse on him. The curse hit his forehead and for a few seconds he did die but being just a baby he didn't notice. Instead everything went black then quickly white then a funny-sounding voice told the baby "You must go back as you have a destiny."

Little Harry didn't know what the word destiny meant but it had all happened so fast and the next thing he knew he was back in his room and his little head hurt so bad and he was so scared so he did the only thing that any baby would do in the circumstances, he started crying for his mummy. His mummy would never answer him again.

The next time Harry died was when his own godfather, who was more interested in avenging his brother-in-blood (and in reality his only love) instead of seeing to the care of his only child, readily gave the child over to the lovable but rather naïve and stupid Hagrid, the half giant who had orders from the great Albus Dumbledore to get the child and bring him immediately to Dumbledore.

Sirius Black had decided his magically enhanced motorcycle would only slow him down so almost as an afterthought, he told the half-giant to take the cycle and use it to take the orphan to Dumbledore. Since Hagrid couldn't apparate due to the fact that he had been expelled from school and therefore was forbidden not only to own a wand, but to practice other forms of magic, Dumbledore had to have given Hagrid a port key to retrieve the boy and bring him to Hogwarts as Hagrid was too big to fit into most floos. Sirius never thought to ask if Hagrid could drive the Muggle-made vehicle just threw him the keys and apparated away to seek his revenge.

Hagrid was delighted to have the keys and access to the strange Muggle vehicle. Of course he had never driven any type of vehicle Muggle or Wizard. He hadn't even been on a broom since he was 14 because he was already too big to fit on a regular broom and, had he not been expelled, he would have had to special order a broom to fit his size which he couldn't have done because he wouldn't have been able to afford it.

But now he had at his disposal this wonderful item so although he tenderly placed the small baby in the sidecar, he didn't know about the safety belt with which he could have secured the baby in the car, nor could he place charms on the baby to make sure the tiny tot didn't fall out of the car or freeze from the cold since he didn't have a wand. Instead he hopped on the cycle and after finally figuring out how it worked, he eventually managed to turn it on and take off.

He had some problems controlling it due to his size and weight and since he didn't know it had an invisibility charm placed on it or could have activated it if he had because he didn't have a wand or knew the enchantment, he guessed he had to fly it high enough so that it would not be seen by Muggles. He managed to climb up quite high before figuring out how to level off and then which direction to aim for to go to Dumbledore.

It was a shaky ride and poor baby Harry was not only unsecured in the sidecar but was unmercifully bounced around in the car and Hagrid was too busy to notice it. He was also just wearing his jammies and had at the very last minute been wrapped in a blanket by Black. It was now November and very cold to begin with and the greater altitude climb the temperature inside the sidecar only got colder.

It also didn't help that the baby was in shock from the effects of the killing curse, his scar had been seeping out blood and neither Black nor Hagrid had thought to give first aid or even take the boy immediately to a healer. Black had his revenge to carry out and Hagrid had his orders.

Thus by the time Hagrid had finally got some type of control over the cycle, the shocked baby had been severely bounced around, was still bleeding and was starting to freeze. When Hagrid ran into some strong winds and then lost control his lack of knowledge caused the magically-enhanced vehicle to stall in the air and Hagrid was at a loss to re-start the now very cold motor.

By the time he realized what was happening and that he couldn't do anything about it, the cycle was quickly falling to the ground and Hagrid didn't have the time (nor had even thought about) to find the portkey, grab the baby and try to get them both out of the situation.

The cycle crashed onto the side of a mountain destroying the cycle, killing Hagrid and crushing the poor almost dead anyway baby in the sidecar.

Once again the baby saw blackness which quickly changed to a white light, heard the strange voice again which said "#%#*$&^ stupid, common senseless wizards" before returning both the baby and the half giant back to life. Of course, besides wiping Hagrid's memory of the incident, the voice arranged for the cycle to be magically repaired, the child secured in the car with a warming charm placed on him and the two magicals to be back in flight and rendezvousing with Dumbledore.

And that was just the beginning of Grim Reaper No. 1002's problems with his assignment.

The third death came within a few hours after the second revival after Petunia Dursley found her nephew on the front steps of the house she shared with her husband and wonderful, angelic son. She had brought the boy in so the neighbors would see and had already read the letter when her husband finally responded to the scream she had let out.

She quickly told him what was in the letter and he, without sparing a moment for any sort of rational thought, acted quickly as only a man such as Vernon Dudley could or would act. Without saying anything he went to the storage cupboard, took out several large black trash bags which he used for heavy trash such as branches, yard cuttings, etc., placed one inside another until he had a six bag thickness. He then went over to the baby in the basket, picked it up, placed it inside the bags, flipped over the tops and then put the baby in the bags on the floor.

He had been totally ignoring all of his wife's questions. He then went out to the shed in the yard and brought in a sledge hammer. Shutting the kitchen door behind him, he turned to his wife and said, "Put your hands over your mouth and DON'T SAY A THING OR LET OUT A SOUND." He then used the sledge hammer to batter the tiny body inside the bags to mush, exhausting himself in the process.

Just as his wife was recovering from her dead faint she saw him wearing his coat and picking up the bag and heading out the door. "Problem solved" he said. "I'll take this trash to an out of the way dumpster and then go out for breakfast and then onto work. Make sure there aren't any traces left."

She then fainted again.

No. 1002 had to change history yet again and it hadn't even been 12 hours since Harry's first death. He also had to spell Vernon Dursley into not immediately killing the kid.

However, it was only a mere month later when the fourth death happened. Vernon couldn't kill the baby but he had Petunia place the child in the cupboard under the stairs clad only in his jammies and with the thin blanket he had arrived with. He would only allow the freak to have one small bottle of milk a day and its nappy changed every three days. By the end of thirty days, the poor tot had died due to lack of nourishment, a severe case of nappy rash which became infected and poisoned his system which had still not completely recovered even with his magic helping and due to the cold of the cupboard.

Again, No. 1002 had to change history, memories and severely spell Vernon Dursley to behave.

Death five happened when Harry was almost two. Marge Dursley had come to celebrate her darling nephew's second birthday, which was six weeks before "The freakish bastard's birthday that Vernon should have taken immediately to an orphanage or killed it."

Marge had been greatly annoyed when her brother (for some unexplained reason) refused to listen to reason. Marge decided to solve the problem herself and had set the two dogs she had brought with her on the child, after smearing a generous amount of thick beef gravy on the child's face, neck and naked torso, before commanding the dogs to "kill."

No. 1002 was really getting angry now. After fixing things once again he did take the time to curse Marge's two dogs with a very lethal and contagious disease so that less than two weeks after her return, all her dogs had died. She had to start her business all over again but this time she choose bull dogs to raise instead of the mastiffs who had so inconsiderately died on her.

The sixth death happened when Dudley had pushed his cousin down the stairs and then jumped on his half-starved body. He jumped and jumped until his mother stopped him because the freak was getting blood all over their carpets. The freak was also very dead.

The seventh death was due to Vernon decreeing that the freak should be doing more to earn its keep. Although Harry was only 3 ½ years old, Petunia started instructing him to cook. He had to stand on a chair to reach the stove and she barely gave him any instructions just told him to "cook the food and don't burn it or else."

There were many "or else" because try as he might, Harry always ended up either under or over-cooking something, especially when having to fry bacon in one pan, sausage in another, eggs in yet another pan all the while having to set the table, pour the juice or milk, make his aunt's tea and his uncle's coffee while seeing to the toast.

Just because it was fun, Dudley would come in at the worst possible time and either push Harry off the chair or just knock the chair over. Not only did Harry not get any food for ruining the good, hard earned food of the Dursleys, he usually was beaten.

One day Dudley came into the kitchen, snuck up behind Harry and instead of pushing him off the chair, pushed him towards the stove. Harry landed in the large pan which the bacon was cooking in and basically fell into the hot bacon grease. Landing practically in the pan, it moved and some of the grease slipped into the open burner and poor Harry was on fire.

Harry's screams finally brought Petunia running into the kitchen to find a pan of bacon spread all over the floor, her nephew screaming since his clothes, hair and skin were on fire and her precious little Dudley laughing with all his might at the frantic and desperate movements his cousin was making as he painfully died.

No. 8 occurred when Petunia was in a very bad mood because Vernon had lost a big sale and now she would not be getting the new dining set she had been promised. She had been bragging about getting the set for several weeks and now she was embarrassed because Vernon said they simply couldn't afford it. Naturally it had to be Harry's fault and although Vernon had promptly punished him, Petunia was brooding.

Early one morning Petunia heard the sound of a lorry coming up the quite street and so had gone out to water the flowers. The lorry stopped in front of No. 8 Privet Drive and Petunia saw the lorry had the name of the store where she was to have bought the dining set. Mrs. No. 8 apparently had bought PETUNIA'S SET and it was now being delivered to No. 8. Mrs. No. 8 stood outside the door directing the movers. She saw Petunia and gave the woman a condescending smirk.

Petunia was mortified especially since she saw Mrs. No. 6 talking to Mrs. No. 5, who both looked up at Petunia and started snickering behind their hands. But they knew she saw them and as Petunia was shutting her front door, she heard them beginning to laugh out loud.

It was the freak's fault so Petunia went into the kitchen, picked up the large cast iron pan the boy was cooking the bacon in and started using the hot, heavy pan to whack the boy on the head. The hot pan burned his hair and face and when the blows caused him to fall off the chair and onto the floor, Petunia just continued to beat him until he died.

No. 1002 was at a loss at what to do. The boy could not be allowed to die as he had one of the most important destinies to fulfill in the past 500 years. Yet damn evil and/or stupid wizards either killed him or placed him with sadists without a conscious who thought of new ways to make No. 1002's job difficult.

Reapers were not to interfere with mortals, but this was ridiculous. He had already spell Vernon on occasion and had risk censure killing Marge's dogs, but 1002 HAD TO DO SOMETHING TO STOP THIS KID FROM DYING.

Not that it was the kid's fault as he was just a victim, a victim of overwhelming circumstances. Now he had to go to the TOP BOSS and get permission to threaten the Dursleys and spell them into behaving reasonably.

And that was what had happened. Vernon and Petunia were brought to the in between or Limbo. They were spelled with a threat which they would not remember but yet be very aware of and the severe consequences if they caused the death of Harry Potter ever again. Oh the Dursleys would still abuse the poor boy as they had been spelled by Dumbledore to do so and, sadly, that was also the boy's fate. But hopefully Harry Potter would not be killed before his time.

Poor 1002. Sometimes nothing goes right as although the Dursleys couldn't _deliberately_ kill Harry, Harry could still be killed via neglect or other people doing the boy in. Before Harry could go to Hogwarts, the following deaths occurred:

Death 9: Dudley really did accidently knock Harry down the stairs as Dudley was in a hurry and Harry was in his way walking down the stairs carrying a heavy vacuum cleaner. Dudley pushed Harry aside but also knocked him over causing him to fall down the stairs with the vacuum cleaner falling with him. Harry broke his neck as well as the vacuum cleaner.

The only bright side was that Dudley also tripped and had the vacuum and Harry land on him and Dudley landed with a thud and banged his head hard on the floor and earned himself a cracked skull. He made it to the hospital, but still died.

Death 10: Due to lack of food, a warm coat and clothing, etc., Harry caught a bug which was going around the school. Naturally, the Dursleys did nothing to help the boy, not even giving him aspirin or lessening his chores. He was on the verge of pneumonia when the school sent Harry home because even they noticed the boy was unwell.

Therefore, Petunia did what she always did when Harry was sick: she locked him in his cupboard until he would get himself well. He didn't. Having a very bad case of pneumonia as well as not being fed (feed a Dursley and starve a Potter when a cold was involved), and not even giving the poor boy water was something that even Harry's magic couldn't cure. Petunia actually forgot about Harry until she noticed a smell emanating from the cupboard. No. 1002 had been busy reaping and helping other Reapers reap due to a dreadful flood in some third world country, followed by a plague or two here and there so Harry had been dead for two days before 1002 could finally fix things.

Death 11: Dudley and his gang were playing Harry hunting and accidentally beat Harry to death.

Death 12: Dudley's friend Piers thought it would be fun to push Potter down a flight of steps at school.

Death 13: Another round of Harry hunting gone bad, but on the bright side, Piers and slipped in Harry's blood and hit his head on the edge of a sidewalk, went into a coma, and died three weeks later. Unfortunately for 1002, it was not yet Pier's time to die so he was brought back to life by his Reaper.

Death 14: Vernon was in a very bad mood having lost a big sale so, since it was the freak's fault, the freak would not be getting any food until Vernon said so. Petunia had to watch Harry's every move while he did his chores so that he would not sneak food. Since it was the summer, Harry had no chance to eat at school or do his "dumpster dives" by which he supplemented the miserable food his relatives allowed him.

It became a game with Dudley volunteering to help but mostly he ran to his mother or father telling them Harry stole food. Actually Dudley had eaten the food, not Harry so Vernon added on more punishments. After having to still do all the many chores he usually had, Harry hadn't been given anything for 33 days except water. His magic couldn't save him.

Death 15: Dudley and his gang conducted an experiment. If they threw Potter off the roof of the school, how many bones would he break? Apparently 90% of them not to mention having several smashed internal organs.

Death 16: The gang experimented again (not that they remembered the last experiment). Malcolm had seen a horror film where this guy was buried alive but still lived. Therefore, the gang grabbed Potter, dragged him off to the nearby woods, made him dig a deep hole, threw him in the hole (banging him on his head with the shovel to knock him out to play it safe), threw him in the hole, pushed the dirt onto it and then, just to be thorough, piled a bunch of rocks onto the top of the dirt.

They then realized it was lunch time and went to their respective homes to eat and rest after their morning's exertions. Dudley was busy playing video games when his mother asked him did he know where the freak snuck out to. Since Dudley really wasn't listening to his mother, which he usually didn't do anyway, he automatically mumbled back no. It wasn't until Piers and Malcolm came back shortly before dinner time to see if Dudley wanted to check on the experiment. Dudley said they'd do it after tea as he was hungry.

Thus around 7:00 p.m. the gang finally went back to check on the experiment. Oops!

Death 17: Petunia was reading a new cookbook and decided to experiment with a recipe to be served the next time Vernon brought a client over for dinner. Experimenting to Petunia meant, finding a recipe and having Potter cook it.

She had all the ingredients except for two exotic spices (well exotic for the Dursleys). It was raining hard outside and Petunia didn't feel like driving in such weather so she sent the freak to the market to buy the spices. He was coming home in the torrential downpour when a car skidded on the wet road and jumped up on the sidewalk and hit Harry. Thus, a perfect stranger managed to kill Harry Potter.

Death 18: Petunia usually fed the freak the few, if any, leftovers if he had earned the right to food. If not, she gave him stale bread and moldy cheese, items which she carefully let go stale and/or moldy so the freak could eat but not enjoy it. One day she was cleaning out the frig and found some yogurt which had gone bad – very bad. Out of the kindness of her heart, she let the freak have the yogurt and even though it smelt worse than it looked, since Harry hadn't eaten for several days, the boy gobbled it up. Food poisoning resulted and in his weakened condition, his magic couldn't fight it.

Death 19: Another Harry hunting gone bad.

Death 20: Marge came for a visit, got drunk and "accidentally" stabbed him.

Death 21: Mrs. Figg was babysitting the boy when her great aunt, an elderly witch who was quickly losing her magic and memory due to her advanced age, decided to visit her Squib great niece and flooed to her home unannounced. It shocked the poor child seeing the fire suddenly light up and an elderly lady stepping out from the fireplace.

The great aunt took one look at the boy and knew he was famous, but she couldn't remember what for. Ah yes, it had something to do with the last war and the dark lord who was killing people right and left. What was his name? And there was also a boy involved, but how?

Her niece Arabella had jumped up and tried to quickly move the boy out of the room so therefore she was either hiding the boy from her or the boy would do something to her so Arabella was trying to save her dear old auntie. Just to play it safe, great auntie decided to cast a stu…stupid….oh that spell that knocked you out, on both the boy and her great niece. How did that go again? Oh yes, REDUCTO!

Death 22: The Dursleys were going to a parent-teachers meeting at the boys' school, thus they had to bring Potter with them. It was to be held at 7:00 p.m. at the school. Vernon had forgotten about the meeting and had come home late after entertaining a client for several hours at a posh wine bar. Petunia wouldn't even give him time to eat as they were late so they would have to leave immediately and eat later.

Vernon could barely stand due to being very drunk but didn't want to admit it, so he said he'd drive them to school. Because they were late, he was speeding and took a corner to quickly and BAM! – no more Dursleys or Harry Potter.

Death 23: The Dursleys were having a barbecue. This was the latest fad in their neighborhood so naturally Vernon went out and bought the most expensive one on the market. Instead of briquettes, it used propane. Being "a real man" Vernon didn't have to read directions. He had the freak helping him set things up and, long story short, Vernon filled it with briquettes, threw lighter fluid on it, turned a switch and both he and Harry….well you figure it out.

Death 24: It had taken her years, but Rita Skeeter finally found out where Harry Potter was living. She and Bozo, her photographer, showed up at the Dursleys one night and knocked on the door. Vernon answered, took one look at Rita and her companion, called them freaks and slammed the door in their faces. Rita knocked again and the same thing happened.

Not to be deterred, Rita and Bozo peeked through a window and then apparated inside the house. Petunia's shrieks were heard. Vernon's shouting was heard even louder. Rita attempted to interview them all anyway while Bozo started taking photos. Dudley came waddling out of the kitchen where his cousin had been fixing him a snack and added his tuppence to the foray.

Vernon attacked Bozo to stop him from taking the pictures so seeing Dudley and just KNOWING THAT COULDN'T BE HARRY POTTER, she asked the small whale-size child where Harry Potter was. "In the kitchen you old, weird-looking hag," Dudley said. So Rita hurried towards the area where whale boy had come from in the hopes of at least seeing the Boy-Who-Lived before things got worse.

Rita saw a small, thin and rather pathetic-looking boy, wearing what had to be whale boy's old clothing doing dishes by hand. That couldn't be Harry Potter. She quickly ran over to the surprised boy and without saying anything, lifted his bangs which revealed the famous lightning bolt scar. By that time Petunia had run into the kitchen and went after Rita.

Petunia ran over to the stove and grabbed her weapon of choice – the heavy cast iron frying pan – and also grabbing a butcher's knife out of the knife block, started chasing Rita around the kitchen. Although a witch, Rita had been too shocked to immediately whip out her wand and just started to run away from Petunia while shouting out questions at the very confused boy. However after seeing the blood lust look in the Muggle woman's crazed eyes, the wand came out and Rita aimed for the frying pan.

"Reducto" she shouted out hoping to destroy the frying pan. Unfortunately, as she said the spell she also had to dodge as Petunia was too quick for her and the spell missed the pan and hit – guess who.

After seeing what had happened to Harry Potter, Rita panicked and started throwing spells at Petunia shouting "You killed Harry Potter, you damn Muggle." By this time Bozo had started defending himself especially after Vernon had destroyed his camera as well as the film inside it.

Death 25: 1002 had just managed to "fix things" concerning death 24, reviving Harry, erasing the memories of the Dursleys, Rita and Bozo as well as sending them on their way, when another death snuck in.

By the time 1002 had fixed things and left, Aurors were already on their way to investigate a lot of magic being done in an area where there were no registered wizards. It was rumored that this area, which for some reason was always carefully monitored, was where Harry Potter was living.

Mere seconds after 1002 left, the Aurors showed up, Vernon confronted them in his own unique fashion, Petunia shrieked, Dudley waddled and although it was against all the rules, Harry Potter wandered into the living room. While the two Aurors stood still in shock, Vernon took the opportunity to grab his shotgun out of the closet and started firing. Two blasts later, one Auror and Harry Potter lay dead, their blood quickly spreading all over Petunia's white living room carpets.

Some people were so inconsiderate. Petunia knew her nephew was a freak who lived only to make their normal lives miserable, but to bleed all over her carpets which she had just had professionally cleaned the month before! Meanwhile the other freak threw some spell at Vernon which caused her husband to also start bleeding on the carpets and even on the walls behind him. It was so bad that if No. 1002 hadn't fixed things the Dursleys would have had to buy new wall-to-wall carpet.

Death 26: Harry was locked in his cupboard because Petunia was over the neighbor's gossiping. She thought that Dudley was out playing with his little friends – her Diddykins was so popular. But Diddykins had been lurking outside waiting for his mother to go to her Tuesday afternoon tea (well one had to eat while trashing all one's friends). Piers had gotten an idea but Dudley just had to best it so he could get credit.

Piers wanted to catch one of old lady Figg's cats, tie firecrackers on its tail then let it loose in her yard. Hopefully it they put enough fire crackers on the cat and lit it, the cat would die and if they were really lucky, old lady Figg would drop dead from shock. Piers secretly wanted to be a hit man when he grew up because that was where the real money was.

Dudley liked the idea, but somebody else had done it last year to a dog and the dog didn't die. "That's because," Dudley had said sagely, "they only tied firecrackers onto the dog's tail. What we need to do is wrap several strings of firecrackers around the cat's entire body, soak him in lighter fluid tie a fuse on the end of his tail so we can light it, throw the cat in the yard and there will be no way he'll survive. If old lady Figg doesn't drop dead, maybe the cat will set the house on fire so that will be worth watching."

His friends agreed that was an excellent idea. But cats were tricky to catch so they would have to prepare a long string of firecrackers, soak them and the fuse in lighter fluid, then catch the cat, wrap it up and set it alight right at Figg's house. If Dudley got his father's new videocam, Malcolm volunteered to film it.

The four boys snuck into the Dursley house and while Dudley went to look for the camera, the boys started stringing the firecrackers. It took them a while as tying string around each cracker one at a time by hand was hard work. But soon they had enough for a good try. While Malcolm fiddled with the camera, Dudley stood on a stool over the sink with a can of lighter fluid in his hand. Piers would be feeding the strings to Dudley who would be pouring the fluid over the strings then feeding the treated strings to Dennis who would be coiling them up in a bucket. Then all they would have to do is find a cat, stomp on it, string it and BLAM Malcolm could film a treasured moment. What could go wrong? Dudley was in charge that's what.

Somehow, while doing the assembly, Piers elbow must have hit the knob on the cooker and turned on a burner. The cooker was next to the sink and Dudley was splashing light fluid around with gay abandoned and some of it landed on the burner.

Whoosh! The fire started, the boys didn't make it out of the kitchen except for Malcolm who was the farthest away, the entire kitchen went up and naturally Harry Potter was trapped in his cupboard.

Death 27: Dudley and the gang were riding their bikes and were Harry hunting on wheels. They surprised him as he was coming back from the store and he was carrying a heavy bag of groceries, consisting of three dozen eggs, and several glass jars of various things. Harry saw them coming and heard them yelling "Harry hunting." He had a second to make a decision.

If he dropped the bag to run, the contents of the bag would break and he'd get a beating and no food for days or even weeks. If he tried to run with the bags, he'd be too slow and would get run over and the contents would still break. If he set the bag down gently and tried to run, the gang would purposely run over the bag. While he thought for that one second, he was struck by a car speeding down the street. Problem solved.

Death 28: Harry was weeding the garden. Dudley bet Piers £5 that he could hit the freak with his mother's cast iron frying pan and knock him unconscious with one blow. Technically Dudley lost the bet because he didn't knock Harry unconscious with one blow, he smashed in his skull and killed him.

Death 29: Marge came for another visit. As usual, she got dead drunk and had to be helped upstairs. Vernon was too drunk and could barely move so he couldn't help her. In fact, he passed out at the table. They both had two generous glass of whiskey before dinner. Between the two of them they had drunk three bottles of wine at dinner (Petunia only had one glass, they had the rest). After dinner they opened up and finished off an entire bottle of brandy. They were discussing politics you see and that makes decent, hardworking, normal people thirsty as they discuss just exactly is wrong with other people and governments.

The freak had cleared the table, done the dishes and was hiding in the kitchen out of sight but in calling distance to serve them. Dudley was staying at Piers' house and Petunia had gone up to bed. With Vernon out cold, Marge had to go upstairs by herself, but since she couldn't she called the freak and made him help her up the stairs.

She chastised, insulted and even pinched him all the way up the stairs until they made it to the top of the steps. She then shook off his arm, yelled at him some more for good measure and then, because she could, she gave him a hard push and he fell backwards down the stairs. She started laughing as she watch the boy fall to his death as he landed head first and she heard a crush. She laughed so hard so lost her balance and then she fell down the stairs head first. She also landed on top of the boy and if he hadn't already been dead, he would have been squished and suffocated.

Death 30: Was just another Harry hunting gone wrong, but Dudley was laughing so hard, he tripped over the body and fell onto the sidewalk, hitting his neck in just the right way to break his spine so Harry's current death hadn't been a total loss.

Reaper 1002 was once again called into the office of the Powers That Be. This was Death No. 30 and the kid was still only six years old. He still had five more years before he could go to Hogwarts where, No. 1002 was told, the kid would really be in danger.

The Powers That Be and No. 1002 knew that Dumbledore had set up the trap to lure Voldemort to the school only to test the mettle of Harry Potter. Okay, so Dumbledore was planning on stealing the Stone for himself for the Greater Good and telling his mentor Voldemort didn't get it but destroyed it out of spite.

There was a very good chance that Harry would be killed yet again due to Dumbledore's insane plans, but The Powers had taken that into consideration. But even The Powers can't always tell the future as that is the final prerogative of the Uncaused Cause only.

It wasn't like the kid was purposely doing anything to get hurt and/or killed. It was always others who did him in. What would happen and how long would he last once he went to Hogwarts and was sorted into Gryffindor. Oh he was going into Gryffindor, even though he was more suited to Slytherin and even Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff. Dumbledore had found a way to force the Hat to sort people where he wanted them shortly after he became Headmaster (without the Hat being aware of it) and Dumbledore needed him in Gryffindor so into Gryffindor Harry Potter would go.

And everybody knew what the House of Gryffindor was famous for, didn't they.

So the Powers and No. 1002 had to do something. The kid had to live to fulfill his true destiny and not just the one Dumbledore had planned for him. They had to do something and soon as not even beings as powerful as they could keep changing time and altering fate.

So the Powers appointed a real live guardian angel with "special angel powers" to watch over the boy. Everyone is born and given a guardian angel, but said angel can only do so much. Harry had lost his angel after his first death. That was the official rule. You die once, you lose your angel.

So the Powers That Be called in a few favors, citing the reasons and the very unusual circumstances. The Uncaused Cause granted the Powers a one-time only favor just because Harry Potter was so important to the Uncaused Cause's own plans.

For the next five years, until Harry Potter received his Hogwarts letter – actually received it in his hands – the Archangel Michael would be assigned to watch over Harry Potter and keep him from harm. He would watch him every second of every day for the next five years for the sole purpose of keeping him safe, out of danger and ALIVE.

It was a great honor and a great plan so how could anything possibly go wrong?

Five years passed. After suffering a horrible life living with the Dursleys Harry was finally going off to Hogwarts. Hagrid personally delivered Harry's Hogwarts letter to the boy on the forsaken rock which Vernon had dragged them all off to. Once Harry's hand touched the letter and then he opened and read it, the Archangel Michael was free.

Did you know that an Archangel can do multiple cartwheels in one second of time? Multiple cartwheels meaning 1,000 in one second. Do you know or wonder why the Archangel Michael did so many cartwheels? No, well I will tell you. He did so many cartwheels in so short a time because he was no longer Harry Potter's personal guardian angel. He could go back to doing whatever it is Archangels do in this day and age.

When Michael went back to heaven and checked in at the Archangel barracks, the other Archangels, Gabriel, Raphael, Uriel, Simiel, Oriphiel and Raguel happily greeted him and asked, "How did the assignment go?" Michael, said nothing at first, he just merely thought for a moment before saying, "Remember that _**little disagreement**_ we had with Lucifer and his followers? Well I would rather redo that fight before going back to watch over HARRY JAMES POTTER."

They six other archangels had the good sense not to ask why because they had heard… rumors…about the Potter kid.

Michael had left and now all bets were off. After threatening the Dursleys, Hagrid settled Harry down to sleep before nodding off himself. That is when Death No. 31 happened.

Hagrid had bent and disabled Vernon's shotgun, but he didn't know Vernon had a hand gun. Once Hagrid was asleep, Vernon snuck over to the sleeping half-giant, put the gun directly against his head and fired five shots into Hagrid's brain. That was when Harry woke up to see Vernon aiming the gun at his little head and firing the last bullet. The Petunia and Dudley hurried over to the rowboat, while Vernon doused the shack with gasoline, and lit a match. No. 1002 had just gotten back from his holiday and this was the first thing on his agenda.

So everything was back to normal.

They had actually made it to the Leaky Cauldron before Death No. 32 occurred. Harry was crushed in the rush of well-wishers, knocked over, stomped on when they all tried to pick him up, only to have Hagrid knock people down so he could raise Harry up. He was holding Harry high over his head to protect him and heading to the door leading out to Diagon Alley followed by Tom.

Unfortunately although the ceiling was tall enough for Hagrid to walk under once they went out the door, this was after all a very old pub which had been built in stages. The ceiling height leading outside was shorter than the ceiling in the main room of the pub and…Harry's little body was banged heavily onto a low beam, it startled Hagrid who dropped him, Harry landed with a crunch, Hagrid wailed then fainted on top of the boy and Tom, witnessing the scene, had a stroke.

But it wasn't a total loss, sort of. Although everyone else in the pub was horror struck, only Quintus Quirrell found it amusing. He started and then couldn't stop laughing. Outraged people threw spells, curses and hexes at the wizard. Quirrell met an untimely end but the black, wraith-like essence escaping from the back of his head went unnoticed. One of the reasons for this was because so many spells, curses and hexes had been thrown at the wizard, that most of them missed him and hit other patrons of the pub. Besides Harry, 10 patrons died outright and Tom and 4 others would have succumbed before the day was out had No. 1002 not arrived at the scene to fix things.

Death No. 33 occurred due to Hagrid losing control of his stomach contents while riding the cart down to Harry's vault. Hagrid quickly moved to lean over the side so he wouldn't befoul the cart, but his massive size only served to tip the cart over and off the track and Hagrid, Harry and the Goblin fell to their deaths. The dragon was just about to indulge in a surprise lunch which had literally fell right in front of him when No. 1002 showed up.

Once things were fixed, Harry actually made it out of the Alley and back to the Dursleys. He had begged Hagrid not to take him back to the Dursleys but "orders were orders" so back he went. Harry had just walked in the Dursley home, shut the door behind him before Vernon and his handgun welcomed him home.

Death No. 34 was the fourth death in one day – a real record breaker. Too bad No. 1002 couldn't report it to the Muggles as surely this was a feat worthy of making the _Guinness Book of World Records_ or his name wasn't Reaper No. 1002.

As Dumbledore had so carefully planned, Hagrid "rescued" the boy on Dumbledore's orders (while not telling him that it had been Dumbledore who had condemned him to Dursley Hell). Dumbledore had been lauded to the heavens, while Slytherin was compared to the devil and the evils of that house would be stressed further by Ron Weasley. The Weasleys were to latch onto Harry with Ron befriending the poor abused, naïve orphan and setting him straight as to what was wrong and just plain evil (Slytherin(s)) and what was good, proper and "Light" therefore right and the only road to take (Gryffindor and Albus Dumbledore).

No. 1002 had managed to keep Harry alive until September 1st. Harry had heard Molly Weasley's big mouth, the Twins had assisted Harry with his trunk and Ron had made his entry. Ron was talking on and on when the door to the compartment opened and a tall boy wearing Slytherin robes stepped in looked at Harry and asked "Are you Harry Potter?" Before Harry could reply Ron yelled, "Yes he is you slimy snake so get out of…"

Ron didn't get to finish as the Slytherin pulled out his wand, pointed it at Harry and said REDUCTO. Just to be thorough he whirled around and did the same thing to Ron. Death No. 35 had just happened. No. 1002 fixed it.

They made it to Hogwarts. Everything was happening as it should (according to canon) but then the sorting began. Unbeknown to Dumbledore, the Hat had finally managed to break out of the Headmaster's control. He started sorting people where they should go.

Granger went to Ravenclaw much to her dissatisfaction as she wanted to be in Dumbledore's old house. Longbottom got into Hufflepuff. Draco Malfoy sat and waited to be sorted into Slytherin but the Hat yelled out "Gryffindor" and Malfoy fainted. McGonagall was shocked but simply levitated him over to the Gryffindor table as she had sorting to finish and a Potter to acquire for her house.

The Hat was placed on Harry's head. It quickly shouted out "Slytherin" and the Great Hall became deathly silent. Or it did until a crazed seventh year Slytherin shouted out "NO, NO, NOT THE HOUSE OF SALAZAR" and then cast the spell he had spent his summer learning. "Fiendfyre" zoomed out in a very good straight line (the Slytherin's father would have been so proud) hit Harry and took the Hat and McGonagall out with him. It managed to catch a few Ravenclaws and Hufflepuffs, curtains, a few tapestries, sets of armor and the like before Dumbledore stopped it.

No. 1002 called in a few relevant reapers and, Harry was sorted into Gryffindor and managed to live another day despite Deaths Nos. 35 and now 36.

Everything was going wonderfully well until the second day of classes when an upper classman Slytherin, whose Death Eater father had been killed in the last war, hid in the shadows and struck Potter in the back with a very powerful Reducto curse at close range. There were bits, pieces and globs of blood and guts of Harry Potter all over the walls, floors and a hysterical Ron Weasley. The Slytherins cheered and started celebrating before No. 1002 could fix things. This was Death No. 37.

Death No. 38 happened via troll. This time Ron Weasley refused to go with Harry to save the know-it-all and tried to drag him back to their dorm. Ron had suspected that Harry was feeling sorry for the Mudblood and was afraid he'd befriend the girl hence Ron's dreadful treatment of her. Ron Weasley was going to be Harry Potter's Best Mate and only friend if he had something to say about it. Potter was Ron's ticket to fame, wealth and eventual power and he wouldn't share even with his siblings.

Ron had been delighted when the cruel comments he made about the girl caused her to go running off and hide all day. When the troll was announced, Harry went to warn her about the danger but Ron, who was hoping the girl would run into the troll and be killed thus solving that problem, tried dragging Harry away, but Harry refused and left without him.

"Damn stupid git will probably get killed and then I won't get any money from Dumbledore," Ron had thought. Sighing he followed Potter – at a distance, in case the troll found Potter. By the time Ron had caught up, Harry was single-handedly fighting the troll while trying to drag away or at least convince the Mudblood to run for it.

The girl was frozen to the spot in fear but still kept screaming. Ron heard Potter trying to cast the weirdo lasagna spell (at least Ron thought it was called that) they had learned that day while the troll kept trying to hit the stupid git with its club. Potter dodged the troll's club while screaming for Hermione to run but she was glued to her spot. Instead of doing the smart thing – like running away – that idiot Potter was picking up pieces of the sink and throwing them at the troll.

Most of the pieces were too heavy to levitate, Ron thought. Although Ron hadn't succeeded in doing the spell, Potter eventually had but there was a big difference in levitating a feather than a piece of masonry and the pieces which might hurt the troll or be heavy enough to damage it if dropped on its head were out of Potter's reach and probably any magical talent the git possessed.

No, if Potter was to survive, it was up to Ron to save him by convincing him to leave the Mudblood to her fate and making his escape with Ron. Ron shouted at Potter to leave the know-it-all and run for it, but the noise of the battle was drowning out Ron's calls. So Ron would have to get Potter's attention another way without risking his own safety.

Therefore, Ron picked up a hunk of masonry and heaved it at the stupid git to get his attention. The masonry hit Potter in the head instead of the arm which Ron had been aiming for. While it didn't knock the boy out, it did break his concentration and caused him to be dizzy so he was unable to dodge the next blow of the troll's club. A smashed and a very dead Potter was the result.

Ron hastily left while Granger kept screaming until the troll went and finished her off. The Slytherins had already started having a party when No. 1002 had managed to fix things.

Death No. 39 happened when Quirrell cursed Harry's broom during the boy's first Quidditch match. Dumbledore had assigned Snape to protect the boy and so had done nothing to counter the curse. It was when Dumbledore had finally decided to glare at Snape to do something when he noticed that Snape was not there. Snape had had a severe diarrhea attack (thanks to Quirrell who had slipped something in Snape's morning coffee) and was in the loo.

Since the death had occurred in front of most of the school and the guests who had come to watch the in the stands. The next thing Dumbledore knew, Potter and been hit in the head with a bludger, which had crushed his skull, and then quickly fell and landed with a crutch head first on the ground. The Slytherins cheered. No. 1002 had to quickly call in reinforcements to help remedy the situation.

Death No. 40 happened during the Christmas holiday when someone (Quirrell?) had let in a few large Acromantulas in the first year Gryffindor boys' dormitory. The door to the room had been spelled shut and silencing charms had been placed around it. Harry Potter and Ron Weasley were the only first year Gryffindors staying for the holiday and it was only after the Weasley Twins had gone looking for their brother after he had missed breakfast and lunch as that was something which never happened. When they couldn't open the door, the Twins went looking for a teacher.

McGonagall had managed to open the door and promptly fainted at the sight, while the Weasley Twins ran off to get more help. By the time more help came in the form of Flitwick and Dumbledore, the insatiable spiders were happily noshing on McGonagall.

It seemed that No. 1002 didn't even get Christmas off thanks to Harry Potter. He now had to resurrect Harry, Ron and McGonagall as they all had a destiny.

Death No. 41 was when Malfoy managed to push Harry off a flight of stairs.

Death No. 42 occurred during the detention they were serving in the Forbidden Forest. Harry and Draco saw something hovering over the unicorn drinking its blood and for some unfathomable reason Draco grabbed hold of Harry's arm and dragged him away. They were both running when they ran into the herd of Centaurs, or rather the arrows shot from the bows by the herd of Centaurs who thought they were what was causing the unicorns to be injured.

Death No. 43 was fairly simple by Harry standards at least. Ron really messed up the potion they were working on, it started fizzing and Ron jumped up and out of his seat without warning Harry first. Naturally he knocked the table over spilling the contents of the cauldron on Harry. Harry would have survived if Ron had decided to help and "save Harry Potter" by casting a charm Percy had tried to teach him.

Or rather he mis-cast the charm Percy had tried to teach him and ended up blowing up the cauldron, setting fire to Harry, himself, Dean, Seamus, Neville, severely injuring Hermione and Lavender and then somehow a stream of fire broke off and headed to the Slytherins who were too busy laughing at the misfortune of the Gryffindors to realize what was happening until it hit their cauldrons.

Snape had been too busy trying to save the Gryffindor girls so his back was turned and he missed his Slytherins catching on fire. It didn't help matters that Theodore Nott had some potion ingredients lying about which he had originally planned to use to sabotage the Gryffindors. When his cauldron was knocked over, the ingredients mixed in with the mess and long story short (okay, I know it's too late to say that but I did anyway), a huge explosion hit. Only Parvati had made it out alive but she was badly burned and would have died the next day.

After No. 1002 fixed that mess, things calmed down until it was time for the "test" but then tragedy struck again not once, not twice, not trice but….well just read on.

No. 1002 was seriously considering asking The Powers if Weasley couldn't die and stay dead as the kid was more trouble than he was worth.

Death No. 44 happened during the chess game when Weasley made a mistake and Harry was killed. Oops. However, while 1002 was fixing things in regard to Harry, Ron had decided that Potter was an idiot and that he, Ron Weasley, would save the day. He managed to drag Granger with him because she could think and knew spells so he would need her, use her and still claim all the glory. But then they ran into the troll, Granger screamed then promptly fainted but hit her head on the way down, cracking her skull in the process. "Stupid Mudblood," Ron said to himself, "didn't even notice the troll was dead."

Thinking the glory would be all his, Ron continued on until he ran into the keys and somehow managed to get all the keys to attack him. He fought them off for about three seconds before screaming at them to stop attacking him only to end up swallowing a large amount of them and choked to death.

By this time, 1002 had revived Harry, Hermione and then the idiot. When the three of them got to the flying keys, once again Ron decided to be the hero. Harry had mounted the broom and was about to soar up to catch the key when Ron, grabbed the broom by the sticks because he "knew how to do this one" but only succeeded in knocking Harry off the broom.

Harry landed hard and cracked his skull but he wasn't dead yet. Hermione started screaming at Ron who was on the broom but he was too busy screaming at the keys to hear Hermione yelling at him. In what shocked the hell out of 1002, Ron once again swallowed some keys and choked to death. He fell off the broom and landed on Harry. Now Harry was dead for the 45th time. Hermione made the mistake of screaming bloody murder, swallowed some keys and met the same fate as Ron.

After 1002 fixed this one, they continued on until they got to the last station with the potions. Hermione figured out the correct potion but Ron decided to grab it first and – oops – dropped and broke it. Naturally a shouting match started ending up with Ron pulling back his fist to hit Hermione. Harry was not going to let that happen and grabbed Ron's arm and they started fighting and the next thing anyone knew both boys had banged into the shelf holding the potions, causing all of the potions, the shelf and assorted other dummy bottles to fall on the boys and Hermione.

Death No. 46 was caused by not only the weight of the shelf, the broken vials and bottles but the various contents hitting one or more of the trio. Some of the potions were dangerous, like the two which contained an acidic potion, two which held a poison and one potion which fell into the open mouth of a screaming Hermione causing her to overdose from ingesting ten doses of a strong sleeping potion.

For some reason unknown to him, 1002 had lingered just to make sure Harry didn't die yet again. After fixing things right and reviving the trio, Harry took the correct potion and entered into the room where Quirrell/Voldemort and the Stone were. Unfortunately for everybody, at the last moment the Idiot grabbed hold of Harry and went through the wall of fire with him.

Ron had decided he was going to be more hands on and be the hero as Potter was truly a fool and Ron would now prove that he, Ron the Pureblood, was the much better wizard than Stupid Half-blood idiot Potter. One guess how that worked out.

After cleaning up the mess of the 47th death, 1002 took all three back to the chess test and made sure that Harry made it through while Weasley was knocked unconscious. Somehow Harry Potter managed to get to the last room while only being severely hurt, due to Dumbledore showing up at the last minute and hurting Potter causing him to be in a semi-coma for several days.

The original plan had been that Dumbledore had decided that he would now duel Voldemort, win (naturally) and since Voldemort was in a wraith form, Dumbledore could finish him off. Dumbledore had recently found a very dark tome which gave him a new theory about how Harry had survived the killing course.

Now unknown to everybody, Dumbledore had his own collection of dark magic books containing spells so dark and evil that even Voldemort would be scared to use them. Of course, since Dumbledore was the self-proclaimed Leader of the Light, this was his deepest, darkest secret.

He had spent most of his career trying to have knowledge of the dark arts and certain other forms of magic stamped out and totally forbidden. Then he, Albus Dumbledore, would be the only one who knew this magic and be the most powerful wizard since Merlin and would retain that title forever because no one else would be able to learn the forbidden magic.

For years he had thought that Voldemort had used very dark magic to create an item called a Horcrux. This would bind his soul to earth should he be killed. His earthly body would be destroyed – evaporated or disintegrated but definitely destroyed. His soul would live on but if he could obtain a new body he would live again and just as long as the Horcrux existed, he would never die.

Since his body was disintegrated when little Harry had "defeated" him, this led Dumbledore to the conclusion that yes, Voldemort had made a Horcrux. But Harry shouldn't have survived. No, Voldemort would be killed as when he cursed Harry, the spell would kill the kid but also bounce back and kill Voldemort. But Harry hadn't died.

So it was back to the drawing board for Dumbledore to figure out what had happened. He came up with the theory that it was possible to make more than one Horcrux and since three was a powerful magic number, somehow Tom Riddle had managed to make more than one and then for some reason when he killed Harry, the boy accidentally became a Horcrux.

Therefore, Voldemort had three pieces of his soul. The original Horcrux had tied him to the earth, the wraith form was his original soul piece, Harry Potter had the third piece of soul in his body and somewhere there was the second Horcrux.

So Dumbledore had decided to kill off Harry during the "fight" with the wraith and once the boy had lost consciousness after turning Quirrell into ash, Dumbles cast a burning hex on the boy to make it seemed that he set Quirrell on fire and it took him also. But after having cast the hex on the boy, Voldemort's wraith had managed to escape despite Dumbledore chasing after it and throwing hexes with all his might at the thing.

By the time Dumbledore hurried back to see if Harry was somehow still alive, No. 1002 had brought Harry back from his 48th death.

Term ended and Harry actually managed to avoid death (despite Dobby's efforts to convince him not to go back to Hogwarts) until the Twins and Ron rescued him from Privet Drive. They made it as far as Harry almost getting out of the window and Vernon trying to pull him back in. Vernon almost had him but when he started getting pulled out of the window himself, Dudley came running in the room with his father's shotgun in hand.

"I'll save you Dad and the freak won't get away," Dudders had proudly shouted. He then fired the gun at the car and it hit the back end near the petrol tank.

Now Arthur Weasley had enchanted the car to run on magic and not petrol. However, there had still been some petrol in the tank and when the gun blast hit it caused a few sparks to ignite as well as causing the car to tip over. Therefore, Vernon fell out of the window while still holding onto Harry, and between the blast, Vernon's weight and the Weasleys all falling towards the one end of the car. The result was Vernon fell, Harry came with him, the car tipped to the side and with the Weasleys still in the car their combined weight finished tipping it over and the car fell onto Harry and Vernon squashing them, the Weasleys were pushed on top of them and the petrol exploded, causing the car to catch afire and thus finishing off the Weasleys who were injured and trapped in the car. It also set the house on fire as well as Dudley, who had been looking out the window to witness the destruction.

Once again No. 1002 had to call in reinforcements as the shouting, gunshot, explosion, car crash and fire woke up the neighbors and five bodies, the car and part of the house had to be fixed and neighbors obliviated due to Potter Death No. 49.

Death No. 50 happened when the barrier had shut out Harry and Ron. Ron insisted they take Arthur's car and fly as _that was the only option they had_ according to Ron. Harry really didn't want to but before he could even try to reason with Ron, his friend had grabbed him and the next thing Harry knew there they were, getting into the car and Ron starting to "drive/fly" the vehicle away.

At least that was the plan, but Ron had never been at the controls of the car and they took off fast and rammed into a telephone pole knocking it over and bringing it, electrical wires and the car crashing down.

The petrol in the car sparked, causing a fire and the electrical lines helped to electrocute the boys. Death was due to ramming into a pole, car crashing, a fire and electrocution with Muggles witnessing everything, including a television news team complete with videocam. "Why me?" No. 1002 asked himself.

Another quick fix up and the boys were flying the car off with a few Muggles witnessing the fact just as "it was supposed to happen" No. 1002 was informed.

Eventually the boys found the train – in fact it was right behind them. The engineer saw the Muggle car in front of him and the boys within it and tried to stop as the car wasn't moving fast enough. Ron couldn't get the car to fly upward and, despite the engineer's best efforts to stop, the train hit the car, which crumbled in front of the train and caused the train to jump off the tracks. The Hogwarts Express was traveling over a bridge and when the engine jumped the tracks it tipped over falling off the bridge and plummeting into the ravine below.

Naturally the engine pulled all of the train cars over the bridge with it and, to put it bluntly, everyone riding on the train fell and crashed to their deaths especially after the explosion which started a fire. Again reinforcements were called into fix Potter Death No. 51.

It was after that death that No. 1002 was quickly called into the office of his supervisors. It was bad enough when No. 1002 had to put things right when it involved just Harry and his relatives, but when reinforcements were called in, all the reapers involved had to put their duties on hold to clean up the Potter mess.

Since everybody riding the train had been killed, their own personal reapers had to be called in to help set things right. Granted, the designated reaper for Draco Malfoy also served several other "clients" on the train, as did several other reapers. However, some reapers only had one student on the train and those reapers had to put everything on hold. It was a mess of epic proportions.

Once things were again "set right" Harry and Ron were off to Hogwarts where Ron drove the Ford Angelica into the Whomping Willow smashing the car and the boys to bits (Death No. 52) and once 1002 had quickly fixed that one and things were "set on the right course of destiny once again" Ron overshot and drove the car through the roof of the Great Hall during dinner. The car crashed directly onto the Hufflepuff table, killing many students, especially when the petrol sparked once again starting a fire and causing the car to explode upon impact. And the Slytherins cheered as did some Gryffindors who laughed because Hufflepuffs had been hurt/killed.

That had been Death No. 53 or four in one day. No. 1002 fixed the Hufflepuff disaster but and had thought when he had fixed things right because (as it was supposed to happen 1002 was told again) this time crashing into the Willow Harry and Ron escaped death but Harry (naturally) still got whomped by the Willow with Harry ending up in the Infirmary while Ron ran off to attend the feast. Even though he would never know about it, apparently being killed four times in one day and resurrected gave Ron Weasley an even bigger appetite than he usually had.

But 1002 was wrong. Once Harry was settled in bed Madame Pomfrey brought him his dinner. He sneezed while eating chewing on a too large a piece of roast beef and it got stuck in his throat and guess what? Death No. 54.

But the day wasn't over yet, as shortly before midnight, a Slytherin who had a relative killed during the war (although not any of the same Slytherins who killed Harry in first year), snuck into the Infirmary to off Potter not only to revenge his heroic uncle, but to collect the secret 5,000 galleon bounty set by Lucius Malfoy for anyone who killed Potter.

So a record was set for Potter deaths in one day as Death No. 55 occurred at 11:55 p.m. when the Slytherin stunned Potter then poured a very fast acting poison down his throat. Harry was dead for the sixth time that day by 11:58 p.m.

Now some readers might complain that they have _had really bad days_. Is there anybody who would like to boast they had a worse day then being horribly killed six times? Okay, the choking on the roast beef could happen to anyone but six deaths in one day and five of them truly horrible. Top that I dare you!

Harry's second year would be the year that the Chamber of Secrets was opened. It was also the year Gilderoy Lockhart "taught" Defense Against the Dark Arts. This was the year a potential killer of non-Purebloods stalked the halls of Hogwarts so one can just imagine the many possibilities for death facing Harry Potter considering he had experienced six on September 1st alone. So do you want a short list of the deaths before things got _interesting_? Well you are getting them. It is just a list of silly little deaths in which Ron caused only one of them. Here goes.

Harry was bitten by 12 Cornish Pixies while trying to help Hermione and Ron catch them after Lockhart had to leave the classroom. Cornish Pixie bites hurt but are usually not lethal unless you get a lot of them in a small amount of time – like Harry – and you have a slight allergy to Cornish Pixie bites – also like Harry.

He just might have made lived if Ron hadn't demanded he go to the Infirmary after lunch because going before lunch would be wimping out. For once Harry really wanted to go to the Infirmary but Ron dragged him to lunch anyway. Harry keeled over in his plate of beef stew. Hermione screamed, the Twins came to his aid, McGonagall and Pomfrey rushed to help, but it was too late. So as Harry's body was being levitated away, Ron finished lunch as "there's nothing I can do since he's dead so why miss dessert?" That was Death No. 56.

Death No. 57 was just a silly little accident. How were the Weasley Twins to know if one of their prank potions worked unless they tested it on a human subject? They had slipped the latest concoction - albino for a day - into Harry's pumpkin juice. They had also slipped it into Ron's juice but in his eagerness to reach for the plate of lamb chops (his very favorite because they were very expensive) so he could get most of them, he knocked over his juice. So a new, untainted fresh goblet appeared and he was saved.

If it worked properly, albino for a day would turn a person's hair, skin, eyes and anything with pigment in it completely white for the space of 24 hours. Harry drank his pumpkin juice, ate some of the chicken salad he had managed to get (Dean had snagged the two lamb chops Ron hadn't managed to get) said a few words to Hermione (after he had swallowed his food first unlike some people he could name) and then before he could have another bite of his meal he turned completely white but then dropped down completely dead.

Oops! It was back to the drawing board for the Twins as the whiteness was correct but the dropping dead was not. They had learned a lesson. Never buy cheap potion ingredients from Mundungus Fletcher.

Death No. 58 was death by detention. Lockhart had Harry Potter for detention and made the boy help answer his fan mail. If that wasn't enough to gag a dragon maggot, Harry had to sign Lockhart's name to the photos he enclosed with every answered letter. Then Harry had to lick the envelopes.

The envelopes contained a special scent which Lockhart was planning to market. The scent was created by Lockhart in that he told the potioneer exactly how he wanted his special scent to smell like. He wanted certain flowers and spices in the potion.

Now this wizard wasn't a potions master like Snape. Actually he only _called himself a potioneer_ because he flunked potions in his sixth year. But Lockhart was looking for someone to work cheap and produce the prototype he wanted and the wizard swore he would make the scent to Lockhart's exact specifications since the potion masters originally approached by Lockhart had refused to use the ingredients he wanted used. There had been a very good reason for that as mixing certain of these ingredients together might produce a decent smell but it would also be poisonous if ingested on placed on skin.

Lockhart was testing the scent out on the envelopes, hoping his fans would write back and ask where they could buy such a wonderful perfume. It only lasted on paper if it was rubbed into the glue which sealed the envelopes. This was the glue that Harry Potter had to moisten with his tongue to seal the 219 envelopes which he had spent the night writing addresses and signing pictures.

He made it to envelope #187 before dropping dead. Lockhart was greatly annoyed that Harry Potter had started sleeping on the job so he assigned the boy another detention. No. 1002 really, really wanted to kill Lockhart but he was supposed to live to be 67.

Filch caused Potter Death No. 59. It was Halloween night when Mrs. Norris, Filch's beloved cat, had been found petrified. Although Dumbledore explained that she was not dead and Harry had an alibi, Filch was too grief-stricken to listen and lashed out at the boy. He went for Harry's throat and before he could be stopped, he had snapped Harry's neck. At least the Slytherins were amused.

Which brings us to Death No. 60. No. 1002 was dreading this particular day as it was a Quidditch match and he was always on pins in needles during a game because there were so many possibilities for injury and in Potter's case, death. Potter played the game, caught the snitch and managed to even survive the victory party in Gryffindor Tower. So 1002 went off to take care of his other "normal" responsibilities.

But something woke Harry up. That "kill" sound he had heard was getting louder so after waking he went to the bathroom to pee. It seemed the basilisk was lonely for Ginny and went looking for her and came up through the boy's pipes, broke through a wall and looked Harry right in the eyes.

In fact that was what happened for Deaths Nos. 61 and 62.

Death No. 63 Ron and Harry were looking for Aragog but his kids found them first. Yum – Potter and Weasley burgers. Death No. 64 they got to talk with Aragog but never made it out of the cave.

Death No. 64 was caused by Theodore Nott throwing something into Potter's cauldron causing the cauldron to boil over. Ron jumped up quickly so he wouldn't get hurt and shook the table causing the contents to fall out of the cauldron but Harry managed to move fast enough to dodge the spilling liquid but then tripped (because Seamus had his feet out) banging into the next table.

His head hit the table, scared Parvati who knocked her cauldron over spilling the contents onto Harry's head. But he was still alive and tried to stand up. However, urged on by Nott's success, Crabbe had just thrown something into Parvati's cauldron before it spilt. Crabbe didn't know what it was that he had thrown, as it was just a strange looking item in a jar on the top shelf of the potion ingredients cabinet. He liked the looks of it and it smelt terrible so he pocketed some if only to see what it would do when thrown into a Gryffindor's cauldron.

He found out that when mixed with some of the ingredients in Parvati's cauldron, it would fizzle for about two seconds before bursting into flames. The liquid flames spread quickly over the girl's desks than all the other desks caught fire. Snape realized what had happened and only had enough time to cast a shield charm on some of the Slytherins. It didn't last as the flames had gone the other way, ran into Neville's cauldron which was an entirely different mixture and, well NOBODY ESCAPED THIS TIME due to the massive explosion which took out part of the dungeon.

Death No. 65 occurred when Lockhart tried teaching one of his "signature" spells. He blew up the room instead, killing everybody.

No. 66 saw Harry being caught in crossfire between some Ravenclaw 7th years and 6th year Slytherins, one of the latter casting a dark spell he his father had been trying to teach for the past year which he never quite got the hang of. He didn't this time either and succeeded only in bringing down an entire wall of the castle, killing everybody including our boy Harry.

No. 67 was due to Ron "borrowing" Harry's Nimbus for a joyride. He accidentally cracked it and just threw some polish over the crack, which was on the bottom of the broom and hoped Harry wouldn't notice. Harry was at Quidditch practice flying about 60 feet up trying to catch the snitch but had to make a very sharp turn to avoid a bludger. The broom broke in half and Harry fell, knocking into Katie Bell and they both crash landed to their deaths.

No. 68 had Harry running away from Lockhart who was calling out his name and trying to catch him to discuss "fame" or whatever but Harry was too fast so Lockhart cast an Accio at Harry. He not only mispronounced the spell but had the wand movements all wrong which resulted in Harry still running away but all his skin being summoned back to Lockhart. It was undetermined who screamed the loudest, a suddenly skinless Harry, the several students who witnessed it or Lockhart.

Death No. 69 happened when Harry and Ron went to rescue Ginny in the Chamber of Secrets. Lockhart had come with them but somehow he had gotten hold of Harry's wand, there was a struggle, the wand pointed upwards and that was when Ron "took charge" using his backwards wand. Somehow the walls came crashing down on the three of them.

But No. 1002 was already there because he knew today was "the day" when Harry would tackle the basilisk. No. 1002 got things back to the "script" and off Harry went alone to rescue Ginny. This time the basilisk was waiting for Harry and Death No. 70 happened.

Death No. 71 happened when Harry first met Tom Riddle and Harry decided to do something very un-Harry like and fired a spell at the ghost. It went right through the ghostly Tom and hit a wall which – you guessed it – came crumbling down on Harry.

Death No. 72 happened when the blinded snake was chasing Harry in the corridors and Harry tripped and knocked himself out. The many ton snake ran over Harry crushing him.

Death No. 73 happened when Fawkes started descending on the basilisk to claw out his eyes but the snake was too fast even for a Phoenix and swallowed the bird whole. He then turned on Harry, looked him in the eye and then ate him.

Death No. 74 came when the basilisk bit down on Harry's arm and cut it clean through as well as pulling the arm off. Harry bled to death just as he was falling from the height where he had fought the snake.

Death No. 75 happened because Harry had just pulled the venom drenched fang out of the diary while the sounds of Tom Riddle's screams echoed through the caverns. As Harry fiercely pulled the fang out it flew backwards and the point of the fang hit Fawkes in the chest just as he was flying down to save Harry with his tears. Once the fang was pulled out of the bird's chest Fawkes could have a burning day, but Harry keeled over dead just as Ginny was waking up.

Ginny looked around saw what had happened and being a frightened 11 year old girl who had been under a great deal of stress for the past few months, she started screaming hysterically. She then saw the sword, picked it up then promptly dropped it because it was too heavy, but its poisoned tip hit her leg on the way down to the floor and Ginny died from basilisk venom poisoning.

Had not No. 1002 "fixed things" Ron and Lockhart would have died because without Harry or Fawkes to rescue them, they had no way to get out of the Chamber and when Ron tried to find a way out on his own, well….

Death No. 76 happened because although everything finally went the way it was supposed to go, Dumbledore had to debrief Harry and after hearing how he pulled the sword of Godric Gryffindor out of the Sorting Hat, he just had to force Harry to pull the sword out again to show to the Weasleys (and because Dumbledore wanted to keep the sword). So a tired, still slightly sick Harry reached into the Hat and pulled out the sword. Unfortunately it came out tip first poisoning him once again and when Ron tried to "help him" by grabbing the sword by the hilt he ended up somehow managing to stab Harry through the heart.

Death No. 77 came about because although Tom Riddle's shade was gone from Ginny, it still had some lingering effects and when they all finally got to go to the Infirmary, Ginny pulled out her wand and cast a cutting curse on Harry's neck, a spell she had learned from the phantom Tom Riddle.

No. 1002 needed a drink. Actually he needed several. NINE TIMES THE KID HAD DIED TODAY. NINE DEATHS he had to reverse. It was only the end of second year (in a few days) and the kid had to survive the trip back to the Dursleys then survived the Dursleys and No. 1002 heard that Marge was coming to town and Sirius Black was escaping.

No. 1002 would have his drink. In fact he would have several during the first week Harry Potter returned home because you see Dudley had had a very bad year at Smeltings. Before Dudley had gone to Smeltings Harry had done his work for him as well as all of his school projects, which was one of the reasons Harry had gotten such bad marks because after he had done all of his chores as well as Dudley's homework he never had the time or energy to do his own.

But Dudley had to do his own homework and take tests at Smeltings. The only reason he didn't flunk out his first year was because Vernon bribed the school counselor to say that Dudley was having problems coping with being away from home for the first time. During the summer Harry had been given the "chore" of doing all of Dudley's summer homework while Vernon had the task of trying to get his Dudders to study.

It hadn't worked out well as although the homework received high marks, the rest of Dudley's academic performance for his second year was even worse than his first as the second year was harder and you needed to have a good grasp of the first year's work if you were to have any chance to learn during second year.

Naturally Dudley had ignored his father's pleas to study and do some work as this year Dudley had gotten the "great idea" of forcing one of his year mates to do his homework for him just like the freak did.

Malcolm had gone to Smeltings with Dudley and although Dudley recruiter two other boys to be his gang, were all just as dumb as he was. Malcolm had some smarts, or at least enough to do his own work at an average level and Dudley had just "borrowed his homework" so that he could copy it as Malcolm, unlike Harry, Malcolm couldn't fake Dudley's handwriting.

They were soon caught so Dudley went after the smaller, weaker classmates or at least had tried. Although not one of the better British Public schools, the sons of many prominent families did attend and the only ones that were weaker than Dudley and his gang were either average like Malcolm or were of such a higher social level than the Dursleys that they knew that one letter home to daddy would take care of things.

Now not only was Dudley on academic probation but his bullying could not be covered up like it had been at home. There was no Harry to blame, no teachers to bribe like in primary school and the counselor had left for another job. Dudley had failed all but one of his subjects and was facing expulsion. Vernon had sworn that Dudley would be tutored during the summer and if he passed the special exams Smeltings would send and depending on the results they would allow him to return for one more year before expelling him.

The tutor had been hired and Dudley's studying would start the first full day he was home. Dudley returned home two days before Harry and by the time Harry was picked up, the tutor had quit in frustration as Dudley just refused to cooperate and had even punched the man when he tried to verbally discipline him.

So it was now the freak's job to not only do Dudley's summer homework but to tutor him as well. Guess how well that went?

Death No. 78 happened when Dudley was not allowed to leave the house until he finished one of the remedial assignments that Harry was teaching him. Naturally he didn't want to do it but he was on a deadline. He hated learning and, if the truth be known, he really hated going to Smeltings as he had to do work there, couldn't eat as much as he wanted and wasn't as spoiled and pampered like he was at home.

His tiny brain was working overtime but not on his schoolwork. He had managed to get rid of that pesky tutor and if he could get rid of Potter – even if it was to put him out of commission for a while – he'd flunk out and wouldn't have to go back to Smeltings. He could go to Stonewall High with his friends and rule the neighborhood all year round just like he had when he was in grade school. Therefore, take the freak out of the picture and there would be no one to tutor him and he wouldn't have to go back to Smeltings. It was a brilliant!

His Mum was going out to do the food shopping so she would be gone for about an hour. As soon as she left he called his mates and told them to get over here and kidnap the freak. So over they came, grabbed Harry, gagged him and tied him up with some old rope and hauled him off to the woods where they rolled him down a hill.

Unfortunately, the bottom of the hill ended up in a stream and the gagged and bound boy fell in face first and drown. He had never drown before (when the Hogwarts Express had fallen Harry had been bashed to death before he could drown) so if only he had known, it would have been a new experience for him.

Death No. 79 happened the same day and in the same way as it was a Tuesday and that was one of the days that Harry was allowed to take a quick cold shower. Dudley got the bright idea of having the freak "slip in the shower" and knock himself unconscious. Of course, Harry did "slip" but was awake until Dudley decided to bang his head a few times until he was knocked out but Dudley banged a few times too many (well the freak wouldn't pass out) and one cracked skull later and No. 1002 missed dinner.

Death No. 80 saw Dudley accidentally pushing Harry down the basement stairs while he was carrying a heavy box filled with old glassware. Harry landed on the box, most of the glassware broke and he bleed to death due to cuts.

No. 81 Dudley got the bright idea of getting Harry so punished that he would be unable to teach him anything for a few days so Dudley could go out and have fun. That night he snuck into Harry's room and shoved a bottle of his Dad's cheap gin down Harry's throat and made him drink it all. He choked to death from the gin before he could die of alcohol poisoning.

Death No. 82 was due to Dudley complaining to his Father (who had lost an important sale and was drowning his troubles with whiskey) that the freak wasn't teaching him right and sabotaging all of his efforts to learn. That was all that Vernon needed to teach the freak a lesson and grabbed him by the throat and started choking him while banging his head against the wall. As usual he got carried away.

Death No. 83 happened when Marge came for her visit. While she waddled up the stairs to "freshen up" she made the freak walk behind her and carry her suitcases up to her room. She had been imbibing heavily out of her traveling flask (which held a pint of cheap vodka) and when she reached the top of the stairs, she stumbled, grabbed for the railing, missed and fell backwards. Harry broke her fall as he and the cases landed first and Marge landed on him.

Death No. 84 happened after the very good dinner Harry had cooked to "welcome Marge" and No. 1002 was lurking around waiting for something to happen so he could prevent it. Unfortunately for No. 1002, there was a terrible train derailment in one of the South American countries where he had a few clients and he had to nip off to help out.

Marge started shooting off her big mouth insulting Harry's parents, he blew her up and as she started to float away Vernon made Harry grab onto her. Vernon had lost his grip but Harry had not or at least until he was about 100 feet up in the air and she kicked him off. Splat!

No. 1002 arrived in time to clean things up and for Harry to escape with his trunk. He met up with a mean, scary-looking dog and pulling out his wand to defend himself (he was afraid of dogs due to Ripper and Marge's other dogs) and he accidentally summoned the Knight's Bus. Unfortunately, since Harry didn't know what the Knight's Bus was he tried to jump out of the way of the sound he heard and the bus ran him over. Stan Stunpike opened the door, looked out, saw no one so Ernie sped off.

No. 1002 had just finished taking care of Death No. 85 when Harry again saw the dog, summoned the bus and got on for the ride of his life. He had even managed to hold on for dear life when the bus crashed into an escaped Common Welsh Green dragon that several dragon handlers were chasing. The dragon was doing fantastic evasion maneuvers and was flying through the pillars of Stonehenge until the Knight's Bus appeared to answer a call near the monument and CRASH, BANG, KERPOW and one blast of dragon fire later and the bus, Stan, Ernie, Harry, the other occupants of the bus, the dragon and three handlers met their demise.

This time even No. 1002 had gotten hit but being a Grim Reaper, he survived (being dead already) but his pride was in tatters. He wouldn't go the Reaper cafeteria for lunch for over a week due to the laughter and jokes cracked and who could blame him. A full report describing Death No. 86 was posted on the company bulletin board to further humiliate him.

No. 1002 finally got Harry to the Leaky Cauldron where he was shown to his room, had the chat with Cornelius Fudge and was left alone to eat his dinner. He made the mistake of trying to open his Care of Magical Creatures books while eating (because it looked interesting) and the book bit off his arm. By the time Harry had gotten down to the main room of the pub, he had bled out and No. 87 was marked on his death chart.

The next morning Harry took the opportunity to explore Diagon Alley thoroughly enjoying his freedom until Death No. 88 happened. He had been walking passed Knockturn Alley when a former Death Eater (who hadn't been caught because no one knew he was one) was coming out of the Alley after a night of over-drinking. He wasn't too steady on his feet as two bottles of fire whiskey will do that to a person.

He wasn't thinking too well and was too drunk to be careful and he thought he saw _A MUGGLE_ of all things invading his territory. Without thinking, he very wobbly whipped out his wand and cried (for some reason) "For the Dark Lord, Mum and the Weird Sisters" and tried to cast fiendfyre (a spell which he had never managed to get the hang of but not for lack of trying).

He did managed to create a whip of fire which hit Harry and three witches, two children, a wizard taking his pet kneazle for a walk (a kneazle is a cat and you don't normally take cats for a walk but the wizard was doing it anyway because you can't tell a Pureblood what to do) and a few vendor stalls.

Death No. 89 occurred because after Lucius lost Dobby due to Harry Potter's meddling he had upped the bounty on Harry Potter to G10,000. Two international hit wizards zapped the poor boy while he sat at a table at the Leaky Cauldron eating lunch.

Death No. 90 involved Harry happily strolling down the Alley on the morning of his second day of "freedom" when a seventh year Slytherin decided to collect the bounty and blew Harry to bits with a reducto, grabbed a hand to prove he had done it and ran off to collect the bounty from Lucius Malfoy.

Death No. 91 happened later the same day when a werewolf tried the same. Narcissa had suggested to Lucius that having the boy turned into a werewolf would see him not only ruined but then the Ministry would have a reason to have him put down. Unfortunately the werewolf got carried away (he had never turned anyone yet) and bit through Harry's neck.

Death No. 92 happened late that night as a Vampire was out looking for trouble and found Harry.

No. 1002 was getting another one of his migraines. Grim Reapers were not supposed to get headaches let alone migraines, but No. 1002 had started getting them ever since Archangel Michael ceased looking after Harry. Also lost was the spell preventing Vernon and Petunia from hurting Harry since the boy was now considered capable of defending himself. Anytime more than one death happened in a day the migraines began. In the roughly 48 hours since Harry arrived at the Leaky Cauldron No. 1002 had to fix six deaths. There was still three weeks until September 1st when he knew the Ministry would be sending 100 Dementors to Hogwarts to look for Sirius Black and at least 20 of them would be on the Hogwarts Express.

For some reason (and not a good one) Dumbledore wasn't watching Harry as tightly controlled as he always had. The kid could roam the Alley all he wanted with only one Auror assigned by the Ministry to watch over and protect him and Dumbledore was allowing it. No. 1002 wanted to know why but no one from headquarters would give him an answer.

That could only mean that they knew a bunch of stuff would be happening and that No. 1002 was going to be overwhelmed. The bastards were probably making all sorts of bets on the number of possible deaths and no doubt how many headaches No. 1002 would be getting. When the Boss called him in and informed him that for the next three weeks all of his other clients were going to be given over others because he would probably be busy with Harry.

Oh hell! He was seriously considering asking to be removed as a Grim Reaper and transferring to Lost Souls Processing, which meant he had to explain to the truly evil that yes they were dead and they were going to Hell and that was that.

It was a truly thankless job and all you did all day long was deal with the most obnoxious people who had ever lived, many of which did nothing but argue with you, inform you that "they knew someone" or had "made a special deal with Satan" or some such nonsense. Sometimes they really had "made a deal" so then you had to hunt down the contract (most of which really didn't exist), do a lot of double and sometimes triple checking until things were straightened out.

Usually it resulted in you having a serious backlog and more arguments occurring. Lawyers, politicians, television news anchors, actors, actresses and car salesmen were the very worse. Rumor had it that some of them gave the Processor more trouble than Attila the Hun, a few of the more notorious Popes and Adolph Hitler. But at this point it would be worth it if he could stop being Harry Potter's Reaper.

However, what would have been Harry's No. 93 death had actually made No. 1002 happy – for a very short time – because it happened to someone else. Lucius Malfoy loved three things above all: (1) Power, with its ability to abuse, torture, ruin and/or totally crush someone (the more innocent the victim the better); (2) Making money (and if it was made by cheating, stealing and completely ruining someone it was sweeter); and (3) REVENGE. And that was what Lucius was going to do as he disillusioned himself and followed Harry, Hermione and Ron into the pet shop.

He watched as the Mudblood bought a cat just as ugly as she was, the Weasley whelp got medicine for his sick, disgusting looking rat, and Potter went with them and bought some owl treats. Lucius went back to where the shop owner kept the snakes, many of whom were poisonous. Still invisible Lucius opened all of the cages and then compelled the snakes to slither away and bite EVERYONE!

However, not even his own son had mentioned that Potter was a parsel speaker and when one of the customers saw the mass of snakes entering the main room, the woman screamed "SNAKES" and grabbed her child and ran for it. The other customer fled also while the owner took out his wand and prepared to recapture and re-cage the snakes and the stunning spells he was about to cast would have done so if Lucius hadn't stunned the other wizard first.

It was then that Harry said to the snakes "Please don't hurt anybody, especially my friends" to which all of the snakes hissed out "A Speaker, he is a Speaker" and then bowed (as far as a snake was able to at least) and swore allegiance to Harry. Harry said thanks (as he was a polite child) and asked if they would go back into their cages and they did – or tried to as a very confused Lucius just stood there in shock wondering what the hell happened. Three of the snakes slithered over to him and hissed "You tried to get us to harm a Speaker and his minions" and since Lucius didn't speak parsel and just stood there, he didn't react fast enough when the three very poisonous snakes bit him to death.

No. 1002 laughed and laughed and then called for Lucius' Reaper to do the clean up as it wasn't Lucius' time to die yet. However, his laughter was short lived as Aurors had been summoned to capture the snakes. Everybody had left the store except for the still stunned owner and Harry who had gone back to lock the snakes' cages. Malfoy's disillusionment spell had stopped when he died and Harry was asking the snakes what had happened. Naturally he was speaking in parsel and that was when No. 93 happened.

The three Aurors who answered the call consisted of two Gryffindors and one Hufflepuff. Being Gryffindors, they hated all snakes because Slytherins were snakes and…well, if the truth be known, like many people they feared snakes. The Hufflepuff was still a trainee and had no say in the matter when the two Gryffs entered the shop and cast spells to destroy anything hissing. Then just in case a snake wasn't talking, they totally obliterated the snake room, leaving nothing (not even Lucius' corpse) that wasn't totally destroyed.

Of course, once the snake room had been so thoroughly and carelessly destroyed, it weakened the support beams and roof and the roof of the main room crashed down killing the three Aurors and the shop owner. No. 1002 sighed and knew it had been too good to be true.

No. 1002 knew – he just knew – that Death 94 was going to be by Dementor. He was wrong, concerning No. 94 at least. Harry, Hermione and the Weasleys arrived late at the station and with only minutes left to catch the train, everybody rushed through the portal. Percy and Ginny used one cart and went through first so that Percy could stall the train if necessary. Then Harry and Hermione, also sharing the same cart, went next. They had just barely gotten through when a very impatient Ron sped after them and crashed into them, soon followed by the Twins. Simply put it was a multi-cart pileup as two other carts had gone before Percy and Ginny who had crashed into the others, followed by Harry & Hermione. It might have been okay if Ron and the Twins hadn't been speeding.

Ron's cart ran into and over Harry and Hermione, knocking them both down with the wheels running over Harry's head cracking his skull, several ribs and other assorted bones, killing him quickly while Hermione had all of their luggage fall on her – especially her new expanding trunk containing a multitude of heavy tomes. The featherlight charm on the trunk broke upon impact. Their car had rammed into Ginny and squished her between their cart and her's and her torso basically exploded with her blood, guts, the odd organ, etc. breaking out and causing her immediate death.

The Twins' cart would have hit Ron if at the last minute Fred hadn't managed to halt it but Ron had jumped out of the way but for some stupid reason, had grabbed onto the cart to catch his balance and instead pulled it over him while Fred's trunk fell on his head and it was bye-bye Ron. Percy was having an even bigger fit than No. 1002 as he had to call in other Reapers.

When things were finally "corrected" the train took off and it was time for No. 95 to happen. However, again it wasn't by Dementor as a very angry Lucius Malfoy had spent the summer complaining about losing his house elf (as worthless as he was) as well as his position on the Board of Governors of Hogwarts, which began a downward spiral of his influence when word about his "meddling" was bandied out. He had placed a few "contracts" on the boy once he arrived at the Leaky Cauldron without success (at least a success he remembered).

Seeking to please his father as well as "teaching Potter a lesson" Draco decided it was time that he settled the "Potter problem" once and for all. He actually came up with an ingenious plan which might have worked well except he had Crabbe and Goyle helping him. Draco had found a spell that if properly done would uncouple a train car. The plan was find out which car Potter was in and then to have Crabbe and Goyle go to one side of the car while Draco was at the other end. They would uncouple the car and then Draco (being the superior and more powerful a wizard) would use another spell to push the car off the track and into a ravine.

Unfortunately, Crabbe and Goyle couldn't do the spell properly so they were to manually disconnect the car and then Draco would do his part. For once the two minions had done what they were supposed to when they were supposed to and disconnected the train car. Then Draco cast the uncoupling spell – but didn't check to see if he had done it correctly. He hadn't. However, he did do the pushing spell fine putting much power into it. Crabbe and Goyle watched helplessly as they witnessed Potter's train car fall off the track and fall into the ravine below and followed by all of the other cars including the one Draco was in. At least when all of the other Reapers came to "fix things" they already knew where the ravine was.

Things were fixed, time was turned back and THEN the Dementors attacked Harry and No. 96 happened – twice. No. 96 the Dementors came in and got not only Harry but Remus Lupin who woke up seeing a Dementor kissing him. Things were fixed but for No. 97 Harry was not only kissed but Hermione had tried to save him by destroying the Dementor with a reducto. She hadn't heard about Dementors yet and therefore didn't know that you can't destroy them. She succeeded only in blowing up part of the wall and weakening the compartment roof which crashed in killing Harry, her, Ron and Lupin.

Just when No. 1002 thought it couldn't get any worse, naturally it did. They had arrived in Hogwarts and got off the train and was making their way towards the carriages when ALL of the Dementors attacked the students. Apparently Sirius Black had gained access to Hogwarts in his animagus form when the gates were opened to let the carriages in. He made the mistake of transforming for a moment (as remaining in this form was draining on his magic and he had been weakened by Azkaban. One Dementor sensed it and called the others.

Black quickly changed back to his form and ran off but it was too late and the monstrous creatures swooped down upon the school and the students. They hadn't been fed as they had been prevented by the Ministry from attacking the Muggles while they searched for Black. They needed some substance and soon and descended on the hapless children. They fed on their memories but some it was all too tempting and once a few Dementors lost control and kissed a few people, the others basically said "What the hell" and the feast was on.

The other Reapers were again called upon to fix things and as No. 1002 revived Harry after Death No. 98, he really started worrying. He was getting very close to Death 100 and that was…very bad. In memory, no one had ever "died" and then been revived more than…well 1002 thought the record had been 47 but he had been afraid to check.

He decided not to think about it as he watched Harry and friends get out of their carriage only to be trampled to death right before No. 1002's eyes. Apparently Sirius Black in his grim form had chased after Harry barking loudly. Many students only saw a GRIM and panicked. Their screams and frantic running spooked the Thestrals who stampeded and, being invisible, couldn't be seen by most of the students. However, Harry, Hermione and Ron could feel them when they thundered over them and other students.

That had been No. 99. Just one more to go before…whatever? No. 1002 was nervous – very, very, very nervous – especially when some of his fellow Reapers met up with him in the Reapers' Pub. They didn't even tease him. In fact, although they said hello to him all conversation stopped in the pub which meant something was going to happen but what? By some miracle, nothing more happened to Harry death-wise until his first Quidditch game of the season when Dementors zoomed over to him and ignored the other flyers. It made No. 1002 wonder if the kid was to Dementors like sweets were to Dumbledore – enough could not be had!

That had been Death No. 100 but there was silence…deadly silence and nothing was heard from the Head Reaper's Office but No. 1002 was waiting for…. Hopefully when **( _not if but when_ )** the kid died again that would be Death No. 101 and perhaps 1002 would be transferred to Lost Souls Processing. The likes of lawyers, actors and Hitler were starting to look good to him as ANYTHING had to be better than Harry Potter. Maybe Michael the Archangel would return? Third year was nearly over and so far no one had died – again.

But 1002 felt in his bones that something was going to happen as it always did at the end of the school year. And then it did and it happened quickly. The Golden Trio ended up with Ron being dragged under the Whopping Willow by the mysterious Grim so naturally Harry and Hermione followed to rescue him. Long story short, the Grim turned out to be Sirius Black and Ron's rat was really Peter Pettigrew. Black swore he was innocent especially when Remus Lupin showed up. The truth was told and Harry believed Black and talked him out of killing Pettigrew because he would never be free unless Pettigrew was produced alive and given Veritaserum.

They were all just about to leave when who shows up but Snape. Naturally Snape didn't believe Black was innocent especially since he didn't see Pettigrew who had been turned back into a rat and stunned so that he could be handled better. Snape wouldn't listen to reason as his hatred for Black was too strong. A fight broke out but Snape was stunned (in the back by Hermione of all people) and left on the floor of the Shrieking Shack. The rest of them left but Pettigrew was brought back to human form because someone had to carry Ron. Sirius was too weak, Lupin was feeling dizzy as he had been slightly injured in the Shack, Hermione had twisted her arm and Harry was exhausted.

Once they got outside, Remus' dizziness turned into his transformation. Damn, he forgot to take his potion. He turned into the wolf form and lost all sense of self and although he desperately tried to fight it, the madden animal took over. Sirius changed into the Grim and tried to fight him off while Pettigrew took the opportunity to drop Ron, transform and run off. Snape had regained consciousness and tried to protect the children but then Black lost his fight when the Werewolf threw him against a tree. You could hear his bones breaking. Snape told the kids to run as he faced the creature and despite Snape's skill, the Wolf was lost in blood lust and…well that was the end of Severus Snape. Meanwhile the trio was frantically trying to drag Ron and escape and the crazed Wolf…well he had them for dessert. That was Harry's Death No. 101.

No. 1002 fixed things and let out a breath he had been holding as so far he hadn't been struck by a lightning bolt or transported to the Head Office. Then it happened – again! This time Remus turned in the Shack while Snape and Black were fighting. Pettigrew snuck away in his rat form and since everybody was watching the life and death struggle between Snape and Black, they didn't notice the transformation until Remus attacked. He got the two men first and then the kids. No. 1002 again fixed things for Death No. 102.

However Death was not finished with Harry yet. They made it to Harry, Hermione and Black being surrounded by the 100 Dementors and dinner was served. That was Death No. 103.

Then they made it to when Harry and Hermione saved Buckbeak and Harry was going to save Sirius from the Ministry and being administered the Kiss. However, Hermione's fear of heights and speed was so bad that she panicked and since she was holding onto Harry for dear life, she kept screaming worse than a banshee (or Molly Weasley in a snit). Apparently Hippogriffs don't respond well to loud noises especially one so near to their ears, Buckbeak was startled, inadvertently bucked and Hermione fell off still holding onto Harry. Splat!

That was Death No. 104 and it looked as if Harry was having one of his multi-death days – because he was! Things were again fixed and Snape had chosen the wrong moment to enter the Shack, knew in his heart that those fools actually believed Black and would save him and again escape justice. Snape never forgave the Marauders for making his life a living hell in school and definitely not for him betraying them and Lily dying because of his treachery. He didn't announce his presence and merely did what the Ministry requested – kill Black on sight if he couldn't be captured. Usually he would AK him but then he would probably be sent to Azkaban for using an Unforgiveable. Besides that curse was too merciful and too quick so instead he used a spell he had invented, namely, Sectumsepra. It cut up a person and unless and they bled to death unless the counter-curse was used – which Snape had also invented – and as far as he knew none of the two Marauders present (he didn't see Pettigrew) knew it. Granted they had found and stolen the notebook he had listed them in and then claimed the spells he created as their own, but didn't know about the counter-curse as Snape hadn't yet invented it. It would be poetic justice.

And it was as the curse hit Sirius in the back, and in his pain and shock, he turned and attacked Snape. He used the Avada Kedavra, which Snape dodged but then Remus bodily attacked Snape and as they fought, Sirius struck again. He aimed the fatal curse at his enemy but unfortunately Harry had at that very moment went to assist Remus and guess what happened?

Yep, that was Death No. 105. No. 1002 was really getting worried now as he tried to remember the record for deaths in one day. Was it seven or eight…possibly more. He had it written down somewhere in a report (you had to keep records of multi-deaths, especially in one day). Another horrible thought was that to simplify things, he had acquired Ron, Hermione and a few others as clients. How many times had they died today? In any event, he fixed things again and this time something was wrong. Usually when he had to fix things, it went back to just before that particular death took place. He had limited powers when it came to such things but usually things sorted out as in severe and multiple deaths, like the falling of the Hogwarts Express, Dementors snacking on the student body, etc., all that extra help was given. The Head Office just wanted things to go back to "normal" as soon as possible and the time frame sorted itself out.

This time, however, things had gone back to lunch time which, to No. 1002's crazed and worried mind, meant either he had to protect Harry from the very beginning of that day's deaths or something had radically changed in the timeline. And it had, as Remus Lupin accidentally saw Sirius in his Grim form and stunned him. He took him directly to Dumbledore. However, Sirius managed to tell his story and then swore on his life and magic everything was true. Unfortunately, the Bloody Baron had witnessed the capture of Sirius and followed him and Remus into Dumbledore's office. The Ghost disillusioned himself and followed Lupin and stayed only long enough to watch as Sirius was revived in his human form. The Bloody Baron had never liked any of the Marauders because they constantly attacked his Slytherins, so now he would be getting justice and revenge.

He hastened away from the office because he knew (from long experience) that if Dumbledore had a reason, he might save Black for his own purposes and no one would know and the vile Gryffindor would escape justice. He materialized in front of Snape who was teaching a class and announced loudly "Sirius Black is in Dumbledore's office – call the Ministry. Since there were so many witnesses, Snape did exactly that as he also knew that if Dumbledore decided it would be beneficial to him and his many diabolical plans, Black would indeed go free. Just as Black had finished his tale, several Aurors, Cornelius Fudge, Lucius Malfoy and ten Dementors entered the school. Snape led them directly to Dumbledore's office and since he knew the password, they all quickly entered in time to hear Dumbledore announcing his new plans. Within five minutes, the soulless bodies of Sirius, Remus and even the great Dumbledore himself were being carried out to be taken back to the Ministry. Dumbledore had been lost because Fawkes had been out doing errands for his master and thus wasn't there to whisk him away.

No. 1002 was briefed at the end of the school year what was in store for Harry in the coming year. He knew that Sirius was to have escaped, fled with Remus to a tropical island the Blacks owned to recuperate, and that the next year was going to be the year he really wasn't looking forward to, namely the Triwizard Tournament, which he knew – but not because he had been briefed – he just knew that somehow Potter would be entered into that very dangerous tournament which had been discontinued about 200 years ago due to the excessive amount of deaths.

At the moment 1002 was waiting (and waiting) for the Reapers of those kissed to come and fix things. But they didn't. He nervously wondered why. Finally he gave up and went to find Harry to see what was going on. He arrived just in time for dinner where the announcement was made about the capture and death of Sirius Black and then that of Dumbledore and Professor Lupin. Naturally everybody was shocked but none so more than Reaper No. 1002.

In a panic he reported into the Head Office and asked "What's going on with the Potter kid? What was to be has changed and the Reapers for Dumbledore, Lupin and Black haven't come to fix things."

His supervisor was also at a loss because if there was a change in plans, he should have been notified immediately. He told No. 1002 to go back to his job and "Keep a careful watch on Potter. I'll brief you as soon as I find out what's going on."

No. 1002 had been so busy due to Potter that he had been relieved of all duties except for Potter and those he was closest to. He had been warned to "Try to prevent the kid from being killed" and things had gone very well until the end-of-the-year crisis or Dumbledore's "test" and then school ended and Harry was sent back to the hell of Privet Drive.

After two days No. 1002 finally heard from his supervisor who nervously informed him "I have been told that the plans have changed regarding Harry Potter. I wasn't told what they are only that they have changed, you are to be more alert and prepared for a lot of potential deaths."

That was not the news No. 1002 wanted to hear. Now he had more questions and fear than before he was briefed. Was the Triwizard Tournament still going to happen? Who would be the new Headmaster? Now that Dumbledore was dead did Harry have to return to the Dursleys?

That was the really big question because Dumbledore had never told his minions the real reason why the kid had to go back to an abusive situation. Would Harry be able to talk his way out of going or would he have to return? Would the "payment for Harry's upkeep" which Dumbledore had authorized so that the Dursleys would keep Harry and raise him the way Dumbledore wanted still be in effect or would the money simply stop as that was another thing Dumbledore never told anyone about the "special details" with regard to Harry's care and upbringing, probably because they were unethical.

No. 1002 really needed a drink or a thousand just thinking about the potential deaths looming in front of him. The Ministry knew that Dumbledore was the magical guardian of Potter because…well he said so! He had the boy in his power and not even the Child Welfare Department or anybody else from the Ministry had access to the kid and/or his money. Dumbledore was the only "known" guardian and now that he was dead there would be a battle over who got custody of the prize…ah the boy.

From the looks of things, No. 1002 was still going to be the boy's Reaper whether he liked it or not – and he didn't – but he was stuck and left out in the cold.

It was going to be a long – a very long – four years and although the boy had to survive, No. 1002 didn't want to bet on his chances of staying sane.

Wait! Was the kid being killed again? No. 1002 ran off to care for his charge and see what inventive death the Fates had in store for Harry Potter.

TO BE CONTINUED


End file.
